THE CAT WHISPERER
Panel 1: At the Vet, Snark looking insane, (leaping and snapping?).
Her human is off panel talking to the Vet (Draw whatever's simplest
to get across 'vet').
Vet: 'She's just a crazy kitten and we can't do a thing about
Snark's Human: 'But doctor, she's driving me nuts!'
Vet: 'Have you tried alternative medicine?'
Panel 2: Human, shoulders down, carrying cat carrier, through
the bars you can see the insane eyes of Snark. She's standing
in front of a big sign with a stack of businesses listed.
Sign: 'ACUPUNCTURE for pets'
'AROMATHERAPY' (with skunk icon)
'ROLF! rrrROLF!ing for dogs'
'HIPPOTHERAPY' (with hippopotamus icon)
'ASTROPRACTOR cats welcome'
Panel 1: One panel. A man with a doctor nametag on his pocket
reaches his hands towards Snark, who backs away, alarmed. Snark's
Human's voice comes from off panel (or draw a bit of her).
Snark's Human: 'Just what is it that an 'Astropractor' does,
Astropractor: 'I simply align her vertibrae in conjunction with
Astropractor: 'I assume she's a Leo?'
Panel 1: Acupuncturist's hands reach towards Snark, who backs
away, fur standing on end. Her human's voice comes from off
Snark's Human: 'Can Acupuncture help Snark's wildness, doctor?'
Acupuncturist: 'Oh, yes, I just stick these needles in certain
Panel 2: Sound Effect panel.
Sound Effect: 'Chomp! Bite! Claw!'
Panel 3: Acupuncturist's arm, he's splaying his fingers wide,
wiggling his fingers a little. Snark's hanging from the arm,
her little teeth and the little claws of her forepaws sunk into
it. So cute!
Acupuncturist: 'Wow! My arthritis is gone!'
(Sound Effect: 'Wiggle wiggle' ? You decide
Panel 1: Snark's lying on her back on a psychiatrist's couch,
the shrink a silhouette in background.
Shrink: 'Tell me about your mother.'
Shrink: 'I see
Panel 2: Snark is busily shredding the couch, while Shrink drones
on in background.
Shrink: 'Bla bla Id bla bla Freud bla bla Meta-bla bla bla Jung
bla ego bla bla
(Stick in other psych-buzzwords if you want)
Sound Effect: 'Rip! Shred!'
Panel 3: Snark sits looking crazed, but a bit pleased with herself
amongst what's left of the couch (not much). Shrink's voice
from off panel.
Shrink: 'It's a healthy sign that you're not repressing your
Panel 1: Snark is bouncing around, looking wild.
Doctor gestures from one side, Snark's human on other (off panel
if you think it'll work).
Doctor: 'This cat is too wild. We're going to have to put her
Snark's Human: 'Gasp! Put her down?!!'
Panel 2: Doctor's hand pointing at Snark, who has her ears back,
eyes narrowed in irritation.
Doctor: 'You're a poor excuse for a cat! You're worthless!'
Panel 3: Snark all wild again, like Panel 1. Doctor's voice
from off panel.
Doctor: 'It's not working. We'll have to use sarcasm.'
Panel 1: Crazed looking Snark, with a bit of her Human and a
bit of a doctor visible.
Doctor: 'I can't help you tame that cat, but I heard of a guy
who lives out in the country
Panel 2: Silhouette of a man with a big cowboy hat standing
on a hill next to a sillhouette of a cat.
Caption: 'He's got a gentle way with a cat, and I hear he can
Panel 3: Man, with much of his face obscured by a large cowboy
hat brim, on all fours whispering to a confused cat, who looks
at him sideways. Caption towards bottom of panel.
CW: 'Psst! Whisper whisper
Caption: 'They call him 'The Cat Whisperer'.'
THE CAT WHISPERER
For this strip I see the humans being mostly small in background,
in silhouette, or off panel, most of the square inch-age of
art being Snark. Hope it works! The movie had too many people
and not enough horses.
1: Title in this panel, or over the whole strip: 'The Cat Whisperer'
In foreground is Snark, clearly berserk, perhaps leaping and
snapping. In background is the silhouette of a man in a cowboy
hat talking with Snark's human.
CW: 'Don't know if I can help your cat, ma'am.'
Snark's Human: 'Oh, please! I drove a thousand miles to get
2: Snark in foreground doing anything you want (licking herself?).
Same silhouettes in background.
CW: 'Don'tcha live just down the highway?'
S's Human: 'I missed the exit.'
3: Bigger panel. Snark in FG, humans in BG (Are silhouettes
too weird for a third panel? We'll tawk
). Humans are looking
at each other with cartoon hearts all over, each has a thought
balloon, as does Snark.
CWs thought balloon has an image of Her wearing a cowboy hat,
holding a cat (or even riding a big cat?).
Her thought balloon has Him in a business suit with a briefcase.
Snark's thought balloon has a fish with X eyes.
CW: 'I'll do what I can.'
Snark's Human: 'Oh, thank you!'
4: The Cat Whisperer is on all fours, his head under the couch.
Snark is on the couch with an insane look in her eyes, about
to leap on him.
CW: 'She'll come out. I can wait.'
5: Snark looks just the same as in panel 1. Her human and CW
are parting, broken cartoon hearts everywhere. CWs entire body
is bandaged up, making him resemble a mummy with a cowboy hat.
CW: 'She's all fixed up, ma'am.'
Snark's human: 'We'll be going, then
6: View from above left of a hatted man in silhouette on a hill,
looking down at a car driving away on a curvy road. A balloon
comes from the car.
Caption: 'The End'